Is he showing up?

Here's my list : donuts, juices, napkins, cups, table is set up, donation jar, client bags, my sweatshirt showing who I am and what I'm doing, grabbing the space in front of the house for parking, and we are ready... except for....

Ut-oh.  I've called the guy who books the shredding truck for Cintas and he doesn't return his calls, doesn't email, doesn't do anything.  I've got to reach his company tomorrow because my company is coming on Saturday! 

Yes, I booked it at the first of the year.  That, he said, is plenty of time.  Yes, he told me we have the truck.  Yes, he said he'd check who would be driving it.  But he doesn't call me back!  And I haven't talked to him for over a month.  See, I'm not obsessive/compulsive.  I just want to confirm we're good to go or not, before the weekend comes and his company doesn't!

Wouldn't that be hysterical if folks came and the vendor didn't?  I mean I could handle it somehow...but I would go bad-hysterical vs good hysterical.  The last guy, who doesn't work there any more, returned every one of my calls with a smile for five years! I wonder if he knew that I knew he smiled.

I'm not the panic type.  I don't pester people.  But I do expect a confirmation!  It's just plain business good sense!

I know it's not worth sweating over it.  I really do.  And I continue to work on knowing why things are all right...when sometimes they don't feel like it.  What I know and what I feel are two very different things.  To know a fact is to internalize it. 

I've gotten a lot better about this over the last couple of years.  I've found myself drifting a bit...not being aware of how I think all the time.  It was subtle...for a long time...then it hit me like a train!  Wake up!  Keep an eye out!  Watch what you're thinking!  How you think is... everything!

I love the inner voice.  It's my best friend.  But it speaks to me only when I'm quiet, listening.  So I've learned to not speak so much, not react as much either, out loud or in my head. 

Really, it's all good.  Doesn't matter whether the truck shows up or not.  My friends and I...we'll have some big laughs and a huge pile papers to shred another (hopefully not too long) time.

At the worst, I'll have something more to write about.

Live richly (and shred),

marilyn







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