Let me reach out to you in a disruptive way.

Is it possible to be both 'disruptive' and to 'reach out'?  Maybe.  However, one seems so off-putting and the other so on-putting.

I think I wear the 'disruptive' description  - sometimes.  It can give deliver an edginess, when a point has been well-considered.

People who are known to be disruptive regularly tend to be looking up a lot, because they are often looked down upon. They don't have a good reason to disrupt - they just do it without thinking. Disruptive behavior often means messing it up without cleaning it up (but in my case I will be ready to clean, most anytime, anywhere).

Used in the very 'today' language, being disruptive purposely, is more of a compliment than a detriment.  BUT one  needs to use it judiciously, not recklessly.  It means putting forth an idea but not acting like you're married to it, or even engaged to it, or even going steady with it.

Being disruptive means staying with it until one changes one's mind.  It is used gingerly.  It's not to be used too often because that makes it a joke.  And not too many people want to part of a joke.

"Reaching out" is used too much these days.  As a kid, I'd reach out (grab) the salt on the table, when I should have said "Please pass me the salt."  In the very 'today' language it's a touchy type of word.  "Thanks for reaching out to me."  "I want to reach out to you."  "Let's reach out to them."  Sometimes I think...no no no...don't touch me!

Reaching out seems condescending if it's not done well.  There should be more words following 'reaching out.'  "I wanted to reach out to you...because you have some strong thoughts about the subject."  "We've reached out to the group because of the quality of discussion that goes on there."

I expect that reaching out implies there could be a backing off by an unwilling recipient.  "I've reached out because you folks have the cash."  "I've reached out to you because you seem so alone." Hmmm...not so good.

I'm beginning to learn how to be 'un-reachable.'  I just turn it off - by saying 'no, thanks' without an explanation.  Have you ever thought about not giving a reason for something?  Try it!  Just don't follow up with any more words!  This is awkward at first but it saves a lot of small talk and rambling and then reluctantly acquiescing.

It's a perfect way of disrupting a conversation when someone is 'reaching out.'

Live richly,  marilyn


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